I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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