With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Randomize
