bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
