I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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