Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!