why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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