i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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