Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize