He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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