woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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