Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I am available for nakedness
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
