i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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