C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I think I just sharted jello shots
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