i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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