Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
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