it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
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She's the barista slut.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
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Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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