is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize