Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
