Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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