Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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