You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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