I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Pants are for mortals
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
