Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
