you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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