I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
