I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
A+ Viking dick
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize