Its about making memories worth repressing
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
