This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
