I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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