How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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