If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize