smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
