How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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