just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
