omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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