My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
