My hand turned me down
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
