whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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