ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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