Dual....:-)
She's JV to your varsity
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize