"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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