we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
