you traded sex for a burrito?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
