:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
