love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
