hell yes lets make some ravioli
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
