you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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