Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
