I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
