Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
