Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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