just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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