Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
