If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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